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How Not to Die On the World’s Tallest Waterslide By Someone Who Lived

If you're curious how one survives a waterslide with that kind of statistical baggage, let me be your sage guide, one who was pleasantly surprised not to have peed herself at all at any point, no sir.

If you're curious how one survives a waterslide with that kind of statistical baggage, let me be your sage guide, one who was pleasantly surprised not to have peed herself at all at any point, no sir.

Bring and/or make friends

Not just any friends. You’ll need one to two friends (you can make them in line; the very best case scenario is about a two-hour wait, so you’ve got plenty of time). They’ll need to be taller than 54 inches, weigh a collective 400 to 550 pounds between all two or three of you—presumably if you’re under the limit you’ll just fly off into the air after that first hump, like the end of Charlie and the Chocolate Factory—and with whom you feel comfortable verbally agreeing to a situation that includes the possible risk of death.

I've never heard people so excited to be told they're 400 to 550 pounds.

How Not to Die On the World’s Tallest Waterslide By Someone Who Lived.

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